Time ago

City of Tears

A very messy cityscape

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Proposals of the Inquisitors - liveinink - Dragon Age: Inquisition [Archive of Our Own]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works

A multi Inquisitor friendship fic with a FemAdaar/Cassandra focus

Follows a previous fic but can be read alone

“Okay,” Nikka Adaar dispelled the flame in her hand as she finished lighting the candles. “Okay,” She took a steadying breath. “Everything’s fine.”“Are you sure?” Maxwell teased. “It’s not like you’ve spent countless hours, weeks, months, however long, planning this in intricate detail.”

It would probably be wrong to mind blast the Herald of Andraste. Tempting though.

Nikka looked around the space she’d set up. She picked the spot where she and Cassandra had first begun their relationship. It was private, peaceful, symbolic. It was perfect. And Cassandra deserved perfect.

But was it perfect? Nikka inspected the small space her fellow inquisitors had helped her set up. The candles, the flowers... she had tried to keep it romantic but simple, she worried she’d overdo it otherwise, but was it enough? She supposed what she was going to say was more important than the setting, but she couldn’t afford to worry about that right now. She’d planned, she’d practiced, she couldn’t allow herself to become even more anxious and distracted.

“Nikka,” Trista called over to her gently. “Don’t listen to Max, everything is fine.”

The human mage was finishing stringing magically lit baubles in the nearby trees. She and Nikka had created them together, and now they looked even better than Nikka had envisioned.

“Trista’s right,” Blair agreed with her sister, handing her another string of lights. “Nikka, you’ve thought of pretty much everything. In fact, you’ve probably over planned. Not to a ridiculous degree, but... I think Cassandra would love almost anything you did for her.”

Nikka felt her heart rate slow just a little. Even if it didn’t take away the fear, deep down she knew Blair was right.

“And you,” Blair gently kicked her brother. “We’re here for moral support, not to make things worse.”

Maxwell held up his one hand in false surrender.

“I’m sorry, Nikka,” he said. “No more teasing.”

“I forgive you,” Nikka said. “I’m also not sure if I believe you.”

“That’s fair.”

Nikka watched the Trevelyan siblings continue their tasks, and satisfied with their efforts, checked in on her dwarven and elven friends.

Kyla and Alariel were stringing flower petals into garlands, and doing a lovely job of it.

“These are wonderful,” Nikka said warmly. “Thank you.”

“Alariel deserves most of the credit,” Kyla clasped the elf’s shoulder. “I had no idea what I was doing at first, he had to teach me how to get started.”

“And you learned quickly, and did just as much of the work as I did,” Alariel said. “Do not give yourself too little credit.”

“Alright, we did it together,” Kyla agreed as she picked up another handful of petals. “Shared credit.”

“Honestly, shared credit applies to most things we do, doesn’t it?” Nikka said.

“We Inquisitors?” Alariel said. “Yes, we have done a great deal together. Though, arguably, Maxwell has borne the burnt of it all as the Herald.”

“Oh, what’s one hand in exchange for a safer world?”

Maxwell sauntered over, a big smile on his face as per usual. His sisters followed just behind him, presumably finished with their task.

Whatever was said next, Nikka missed. She had noticed the sun going down, dusk falling, and realized that Cassandra would arrive soon. Because Nikka had asked her to meet her here at dusk. Just like once before. Why had she been so confident then, yet so nervous now? The fear of her efforts not being good enough, her plans not prepared enough... adrenaline had already been coursing through her all day, but now, with so little time left before Cassandra arrived, doubt had gripped her heart.


Trista’s brought Nikka out of her trance.

“Nikka,” Trista said very gently. “Do you honestly think Cassandra will say no?”

Nikka took a deep breath.

“No, I wouldn’t be proposing if I didn’t know this was what we both wanted. That’s not what I’m nervous about.”

The others allowed her a pause.

“Cassandra deserves to have everything she wants. I just want to know I got it right for her.”

Her fellow Inquisitors threw glances at each other. They were all smiling.

“Nikka,” Blair said warmly. “You did.”

“How do you know?” Nikka said.

“Because I’ve been proposed to.” Blair said. “I didn’t anticipate Sera’s proposal, but it was exactly what I wanted. Because it was her. And it was us, and I loved every moment of it.”

“I can concur,” Kyla said. “It didn’t matter to me how Cullen proposed, I was just happy that he did.”

“And speaking as someone who has been the proposer,” Trista said. “At least for me... once Josie was in front of me it was easy. Because... you know those moments where you feel the full strength of your love for someone?”

Nikka nodded.

“When I knew I was going to ask her, and she was there in front of me, any nervousness I may have had was overwhelmed by love. I needed to ask her to marry me, and it wasn’t difficult at all. Everything was exactly right because we loved each other.”

Nikka closed her eyes, let herself steady.

“You’re right,” she smiled softly. “Cass and I have already discussed marriage, we both know it’s something we want. I still want it all to be perfect, and against all reason a small part of me still doubts, but I do know that nothing else matters as much as me asking and her saying yes.”

“Exactly,” Kyla said. “It will be perfect because of the two of you. I get wanting to make it special, but you have to know it already is.”

“Right,” Nikka nodded. “It’s already special.”

“Now,” Kyla said, laying down her finished garland. “How about we distracted you by teasing the boys about dragging their feet?”

“I’m not dragging my feet,” Alariel offered a small smile. “Dorian has many other important things he has to manage. I would not wish to put any further burden on him.”

“You think you proposing would be a burden?” Kyla asked.

Alariel laid down his last garland.

“Not exactly,” he said. “If I ask him to marry me, he may feel it unfair to make me wait. I wouldn’t want him to feel any pressure to rush into a wedding to please me.”

“Alariel, that’s a conversation you can have with him,” Blair said. “You can tell him you’re happy to wait.”

“Perhaps so.” Alariel said. “I just worry that my asking in itself will seem like an unwillingness to wait, even if I explain otherwise.”

“That can be part of that conversation between the two of you,” Blair said.

“Well, you do make communication sound awfully sensible,” Alariel said.

“Indeed,” Kyla said. “And what about you, Max?”

Maxwell was uncharacteristically silent.

“Thom and I have been through a lot, both together and apart,” Maxwell absentmindedly cradled the end of his arm in his hand. “We’ve helped each other heal. You know I’m not much good at planning ahead. There were always other things to think about, other ways we were building our relationship. Other ways we were growing as people.”

He paused.

“Perhaps it is time to start thinking about further commitment. Marriage hadn’t been on my mind, but... I think that is what I want. And maybe he doesn’t want to wait anymore. There is a bit of an age gap between us, maybe he’s ready for settling down. And maybe I don’t mind.”

It was rare to see Maxwell so unguardedly thoughtful. But that meant he was serious, and that he cared a great deal.

“It’s a conversation to have with him, at least,” Maxwell said. “We talk about what we want.”

They all let the silence be for a moment. They could be comfortable in it together.

“Well,” Alariel said. “I think this is as long as we can be by your side. Any longer and we risk ruining your solitude with Cassandra.”

“Of course,” Nikka could feel her nerves coming back at the thought of being left alone.

Alariel gently clasped her shoulders.

“I think I can speak for all of us when I say we were glad to be here, offering solace for as long as we could. But now it is time for just you and your beloved. It would not be the same if we were here when she arrived.”
“And you know it, because that was exactly the plan you laid out for us,” Maxwell said, his smile returning.

“I know,” Nikka nodded. “I know.”

“Trust me,” Trista said. “It will be easier than you fear.”

“You’re right,” Nikka said. “I’ll be alright.”

It was not said with great confidence, but it was a start.

Nikka watched her friends disappear, and tried not to scare herself in the solitude. Over thinking was easier to curtail with someone to talk to. That was why she’d asked her friends to wait with her in the first place. In the silence worry was harder to overcome.

She inspected the all the elements of her setup too many times; candles, flowers, strung lights and garlands, nothing was out of place. Yet she kept checking. And pacing.

She heard footsteps approaching.

A wave of adrenaline rushed through her. The waiting was ending, and now all she could do was play out her plan. Possibly with some spur-of-the-moment alterations, she knew not everything was likely to go according to script.

But they would go right.

A sense of calm overtook her. Now that the moment was here... she knew it would be alright. However it went, it would be alright. Because Cassandra loved her. She knew that.

Cassandra stepped into view. And she smiled so fondly at Nikka.

The fear was gone, at least in this moment. Because Nikka loved Cassandra. And that, in all its depth, was all she felt. And it was all that she needed to make this night perfect.

Time ago

Anders: Let's all just be needlessly ominous for the rest of the year.

Isabela: If you live that long.

Time ago

In the Shadow of the Dread Wolf

My Portfolio

Time ago

Here is video of how I ended up in that crevasse.

Time ago

Recently got back into Dragon Age Inquisition and wanted to draw my Inquisitor. Edge boy alert

Time ago

I really wish the game would allow us to change the body type of our Inquisitor. I always imagine my Adaar to be rather slender, especially compared to Bull!

Time ago

Romancing Josephine in Dragon Age Inquisition and I just spoke with Leliana. She's so good to Josie but when you're the one she's lowkey threatening... Oof.

I love how Leliana is protective over Josie. I love friends like that.

Time ago

the inquisitor visits tevinter - dorian shows him around some of the gardens.

Time ago

O, Grey Warden..

Some older art from over on tumblr lol

intrepid-inkweaver(Any Pronouns)
Time ago

I was trying to design my Grey Warden's tattoo.

Time ago

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Time ago

A Slow Morning - liveinink - Dragon Age II [Archive of Our Own]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works

Isabela/F!Hawke fic

There was nothing particularly special about this specific morning. Nothing wonderfully out of the ordinary. Nothing particularly special planned for the day. And yet, as Hawke lay sprawled across her bed, watching Isabela getting dressed, she could not suppress a content smile.

It had been some time since their reunion. The reunion of their romantic relationship, anyway. Though really, this was the official beginning of their romantic relationship if one was going to split hairs. Regardless, despite all the chaos of their lives and in the world at large, Hawke couldn’t help but be overwhelming happy this past while.

So there she lay, allowing herself to simply enjoy the warmth filling her chest.

“Would you help me with this, sweet thing?” Isabela asked from across the room as she was beginning to braid her hair.

“Of course.”

Hawke walked over to where Isabela sat, and took the soft hair in her hands. She had always loved Isabela’s hair. It was soft, and smooth, and such a lovely color. Hawke separated and crossed the gentle waves, savoring the feeling as they ran though her hands. She knew Isabela wouldn’t mind if she dawdled a little. Otherwise she wouldn’t have been asked to help. Isabela was perfectly capable of braiding her own hair. And Hawke was happy to take any excuse to just simply be close.

Still, even in savoring the moment, Hawke knew she couldn’t stall too long. She tied off the braid, and kissed the top of Isabela’s head. She felt Isabela lean into her, and wrapped her arms around Isabela’s shoulders from behind.

“What was that for?”

Hawke could hear the smile in Isabela’s voice.

“I love you. Do I need another reason?”

“I suppose you don’t.”

Isabela hugged Hawke’s arms closer to her chest.

“But we do have places to be, unfortunately.” Isabela sighed, standing up to face Hawke. “And you get upset when you feel you’ve let someone down. Even if it’s just making them wait a little.”

“I don’t like being the cause of any distress.”

“I know.” Isabela said. “You get this adorably heartbreaking little sad look on your face every time you feel you’ve bothered someone.”

Hawke must have had some sort of reaction on her face, because Isabela giggled, then gave her a quick, tender kiss.

“It’s just because you’re such a good person. Maybe too good for your own good.”

“Well,” Hawke let a smirk slip onto her face, “I am selfishly taking extra time to relax and enjoy myself this morning.”

“Taking a few extra minutes doesn’t really count as selfish, sweet thing.”

Hawke chuckled.

“Regardless, let me savor this a little longer.”

Hawke ran a hand down Isabela’s cheek. It still took Hawke’s breath away how beautiful she was. She gazed into Isabela’s eyes; she had still yet to see more gorgeous eyes. She didn’t expect to ever find a rival.

“I’m taking time today.” Hawke said. “I feel like I need to do that sometimes. And right now, I don’t want this moment to end.”

“Well, I’m certainly not going to stop you.”

Isabela reached a hand out to Hawke’s torso. First flat against Hawke’s diaphragm, then she let it fall lower. Hawke saw Isabela flinch, just enough, and looked down to where Isabela’s hand rested. Not visible beneath Hawke’s clothes, but they both knew exactly where her scar was. Long and jagged from the duel with the Arishok.

Hawke placed one hand above Isabela’s and the other behind her head. She gently pulled Isabela to her and placed a kiss on her forehead. Isabela wrapped her arms around Hawke, and Hawke returned the embrace.

This was a discussion they’d had before. And from Hawke’s perspective a wound long healed. But the same could not be said for Isabela. It was likely a discussion they would have again, but not now.

Isabela pulled back after some time.

“You really should get dressed.” She said with a small smile.

“Help me?”

Isabela chuckled.

“Of course.”

They both knew Hawke needed no help with anything. They just wanted to be close to each other for a little while longer.

Though, Hawke supposed, smiling to herself, they had all the time they required now. Whatever disaster may decide to strike next, Hawke finally knew for certain that she would always face it with the woman she loved by her side.

Hawke had always dared to hope for more with Isabela, though she never pushed. She simply waited. Even when it might have seemed pointless. And she was rewarded with happiness and contentment like she’d never known.

After all the tragedy and trauma, Hawke was finding moments of peace. Moments like this.

“Alright, you’re all set, sweet thing.” Isabela said as she finished tying back Hawke’s hair.

Hawke looked back at her partner.

“I think you’re right.”

She reached out to take Isabela’s hand as they headed for the door.

Hawke treasured these moments.

And she was determined to have many more.

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Goodnight My Love - liveinink - Dragon Age: Inquisition [Archive of Our Own]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works

Cassandra/F!Adaar fic

It was a gentle night. Serene. Still. Quiet. Nikka lay comfortably in her bed, running one hand languidly through Cassandra’s hair. Cassandra had become engrossed in a book, and was still up reading, though Nikka didn’t mind. She loved how engaged Cassandra was in her books, how much joy she gained from them. It was utterly adorable. And some of the books were really quite good. Not all. But a fair number.

So Nikka laid with her eyes close, Cassandra resting her head on her shoulder, and everything, finally, right in the world. For now at least. They’d closed the Breach. Corypheus was gone. They had time.

So Nikka couldn’t help but smile to herself. What more could she ask for?

Well, if she was being honest, there was a future she dreamed of. She did have hopes and desires. But a significant number of them focused on the woman laying in her arms. So really, everything was just as it should be. No need to rush.

“What is it?” Cassandra’s voice broke Nikka from her reverie.


“You sighed.”

“Did I?” Nikka hadn’t noticed.

“Yes.” Cassandra looked away from her book. “Contentedly, I think.”

“You’d be right.”

“I’m glad you’re happy.” Cassandra turned to face Nikka. “I’m glad you’re here, and whole, and alive.”

“That got seriously rather suddenly.”

“Don’t make jokes. I feared for your life days ago, I’m allowed to celebrate your safety.”

“Certainly.” Nikka said. “But you don’t have to fear for me anymore.”

“We both know that’s not true. I will always worry about you. I love you”

The corner of Nikka’s lips quirked up into a ghost of a smile.

“And I you. But right now, here, in this moment we are safe. There are no burdens on our shoulders just yet. Let’s not get too weighed down by what has been or will be.”

Cassandra continued to hold Nikka’s gaze for a moment longer before letting out a sigh.

“You’re right. Let us simply enjoy each other's company for tonight.”

“Agreed.” Nikka smiled. “And you have not yet told me if the princess and the knight get together.”

“Oh, it is awful!” Cassandra picked her book up again. “The cultists have captured the knight...”

Nikka listened intently with a smile never fading from her face. Maker, how she loved this woman. And now she could finally look forward to the future unhindered. Joyful possibility swelled in her chest.

If the world had any further obstacles to place in her path, she felt certain she could meet them now. Whatever doubts may have been, wiped away with recent victory. They saved the world. Surely nothing worse then what they already faced would come their way.

“But it is growing late, and this is probably a good place to stop for tonight.” Cassandra closed her book, and set it aside.

Nikka let Cassandra cuddle further into her.

“Comfortable?” Nikka kissed the top of Cassandra’s head.

“Yes, thank you.” Nikka could hear the smile in Cassandra’s voice. “Goodnight, Nikka.”

“Goodnight, my love.”

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Time ago

The Queens of Ferelden - Chapter 1 - liveinink - Dragon Age - All Media Types [Archive of Our Own]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works

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Time ago

Quiet Nights - liveinink - Dragon Age: Origins [Archive of Our Own]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works

Morrigan/F!Mahariel fic

“You’re still reading the fake grimoire?”

Morrigan lifted her gaze from the pages in front of her, to Idrina. Idrina was laying comfortably beside her, her head resting against Morrigan’s side.

“I would have thought you’d spend all your free time with the real one.”

Morrigan returned her gaze to her reading, flipping a page.

“There is still some value in what is written here.”

Idrina shifted to better see Morrigan’s face, though there was not a great deal to be learned from her impassive expression.

“Like what?”

“Full of questions, are you?”

“Always, according to you.”

Idrina could tell that Morrigan was trying to hide her smile, but Idrina saw. She always saw. She felt that Morrigan had mostly given up trying to hide her fondness for Idrina, but old habits die hard, and there were still moments Idrina could tell she was holding back.

Morrigan continued the conversation without looking away from the book.

“Apart from the very useful information of Flemeth’s plans for me, this tome also contains some other interesting facts pertaining to Flemeth’s life, and mine.”

Idrina waited a moment, before prompting further.

“Such as?”

Morrigan hesitated.

“Such as the confirmation that, if this book can be believed, I am in fact Flemeth’s child by blood. And the vague identity of my father.”

“Oh.” Idrina said. “What does it say?”

“That he was a Dalish man whose clan was traveling through the Wilds. It says no more than that.”

“He was Dalish?”

“Indeed. It would seems Flemeth strayed from her rumored regular practice of stealing away Chasind men.”

“You’re Dalish!” Idrina hopped up on her knees.

“Only by blood.” Morrigan replied. “I’ve not been a part of the culture at any point in my life.”

“I could teach you, if you like.”

Morrigan lowered the book and looked Idrina in the eyes for the first time in this conversation. She hesitated before speaking.

“I’ve no intention of seeking out my father or his clan. I don’t need to find a family.”

“You don’t have to go looking.” Idrina said. “I can still teach you about Dalish culture. If you want to learn.”

Morrigan gaze wavered away from Idrina’s.

“I suppose it could not hurt to learn.”

Idrina smiled warmly, her eyes soft.

“We don’t have to start tonight. Just know you can ask me anytime.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.”

They were comfortable in the silence for a moment.

“We should probably get some sleep.” Idrina finally said. “We still have a Blight to end and a nation to unify.”

Morrigan closed the book with a just a moment’s reluctance.

“Of course, it is getting late.”

The pair laid down to rest in the tent they now shared. Morrigan settled into Idrina’s embrace, and it still warmed Idrina’s heart. The trust Morrigan showed in her now, the comfort.


Idrina opened her eyes.


She could sense Morrigan’s hesitance.

“Tell me something about the Dalish.”

Idrina hadn’t expected to hear that, but warmth filled her heart all the same. She gently kissed Morrigan’s shoulder.

“Of course. I’ll tell you a story about Mythal.”

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When This Is Over - Chapter 1 - liveinink - Mass Effect Trilogy [Archive of Our Own]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works

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Time ago

Earthborn - liveinink - Mass Effect Trilogy [Archive of Our Own]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works

Tali/FemShep fic

There was a girl who stood in the park. She walked along the familiar paths with worn boots kicking up dust. Frayed jeans brushed against the ground, and an oversized hoodie hung loosely on her shoulders. The shirt was new. The first new article of clothing she’d received in years. It was red, of course. The same off-color red all her “family members” wore.

She walked with eyes downcast. Stars shone down upon her, her guardians in a world where there were none. Yet, much as she loved her stars, she so rarely gazed upon them. The girl always seemed to find her eyes drawn to the ground as if by magnetic force. But she knew her stars were there, and she knew her course. She walked the same paths every night. It was her only escape from her dreadful reality. She allowed herself to daydream in the park, her mind lost in undescribable trips of glorious fantasy. Yet, always she was alert. Danger triggered a sixth sense of hers that responded immediately. As it did that night.

The girl followed her usual route. Wrapped in a bittersweet dream. A gentle breeze brushed delicate strands of dark hair across her alabaster face. As she lifted her head to gently replace the rogue strands of hair, sparkling brown eyes met a shadow.

The shadow spoke with a voice of smooth velvet, deep as rich purple.

“So this is where you escape to every night.”

The girl simply stared back, brow furrowed.

“Not the most secret hideout.”

She did not respond.

The shadow was forced to step forward. A tall, broad-shouldered man likely in his thirties smirked at her. Muscular arms crossed his chest.

“What do you do out here, anyway?”

The girl remained silent. Then spoke suddenly, with conviction.


The man scoffed.

“That’s awfully dangerous.”


The look of determination did not slide from her face.

“I guess you never were really afraid of danger.”
The man’s smirk had disappeared.

“I feel like, now that I’ve caught you,” the man hesitated, “everything’s going to change. Don’t know why, can’t explain it. But I do.”

The girl did not move.

“You want to leave, don’t you?”

The girl hesitated. Then came a very short nod.

“Well, you’re eighteen now, guess I can’t stop you.”

The man broke eye contact.

“But that means you’ve gotta go now. The others will stop you. Even if they’ve no right.”

The girl licked her lips.

“Thank you, Leon.”

He shrugged.

“Where will you go?”

His voice almost cracked.

The girl finally lifted her head to her beloved stars. She felt in an instant their infinite light, and a content warmth filled her chest.

“The stars.” she replied serenely

Leon swallowed, “You better get going.”

She nodded. Slowly, she turned, and began to walk away.

“Jonica!” Leon called out.

She turned briskly.

“I hope you find happiness. I hope you find wholeness somewhere out there. You deserve so much more than you’ve had.”

The girl felt her eyes tear.

“Thank you, Leon. I won’t forget you. I promise.”

Then she turned for the last time, and walked away without a second glance.

Leon looked on, a melancholy in his eyes.

“Good luck, Shepard. Let the galaxy know how amazing you are.”


Jonica stood solemnly before the fish tank. She leaned against the cold glass, watching the fish swim aimlessly, blissfully unaware of the chaos and suffering erupting throughout the galaxy. Jonica thought for a moment how she might like to simply meld with the water. Forever flowing and alive, yet completely unconscious. It was thoughts such as these which saved her from the endless avalanche of immensely more unpleasant ones.

“Jon?” a voice called groggily

A small smile tugged at the corner of her mouth. She turned her head.

“Jon, are you alright?” Tali slowly pushed herself upright in the bed

“Yes, I’m fine.” she smiled softly, “No need to worry.”

“Considering the odds we’re facing every day, the burden that’s been dropped on your shoulders,” Tali said as she began to shake the sleep from her head, “I’d say there’s plenty of reason to worry.”

“Maybe so.” Jonica conceded, “But right now, I’m fine. Really.”

Tali examined her closely.

“Something must have woken you up.” Tali reasoned, “What was it?”

“More nightmares.” Jonica replied somberly.

Tali gazed upon her. Her eyes were glazed with exhaustion, and there seemed to be a permanent furrow in her brow. She stood with her weight on one leg, arms crossed, and shoulders slumped, as if she were imploding. Tali saw the weight of the galaxy crushing her, and she wished she could lift it. But since she couldn’t, she decided to help the woman she loved in any way she knew how. And tonight that was simply by being there.

“Here,” she coaxed, pulling back the covers, “Come back to bed.”

Jonica hesitated, but obeyed. Tali pulled back the covers, and let her slide in next to her. She did not meet Tali’s eyes, but simply stared ahead.

“Do you want to talk about?” Tali asked.

“Not really.”

Tali examined her for a moment.

“Okay.” she replied, “But, if you change your mind... I’ll be here.”

“I know, Tali.” she turned to meet her gaze.

Jonica’s eyes shone with love and gratitude, briefly lifting the veil of stress and exhaustion. A small smile tugged at Tali’s lips. She reached out a hand to caress her lover’s face, and Jon sunk into her touch. Tali remembered the first time she’d felt her skin. She’d been surprised by how pleasant it was to the touch. She gently rubbed her thumb along her cheek. She traced the spot where her scar had once been. A crescent moon across her cheekbone. She always assumed it had been a relic from Akuze, but eventually she’d learned Jon had gained it in her days in an Earth gang. It had been removed during the Lazarus project, which Jon was actually a little upset about.

Tali abandoned the phantom scar, and began to trace patterns in the splash of light freckles across Jon’s nose. She’d always been intrigued by them, a facial feature she had not seen prior to meeting her. She moved her hand behind her neck, and into the soft folds of her dark hair. Brown had never been one of Tali’s favorite colors, but after gaining such appreciation for Jon’s hair, and big, sparkling eyes, it had become her most beloved color.

As she stared into said eyes, Tali played with Jonica’s long hair. It was so soft and smooth, and the way it fell over her face sometimes... it made her heart skip a beat. And those eyes. Probably her favorite thing about Jon. Her eyes that were always bright with life, love, and intelligence. She was such a quiet person. But her eyes spoke so loudly.

It was moments like these, stolen moments of perfect peace, that Tali could feel her love for Jonica spread from her heart, filling her body.

“Jonica...” she breathed.

Jon closed her eyes as she turned into Tali’s palm, and wrapped her hand lovingly around her wrist.

In a flash, Tali thought back to all the milestones in their relationship. When they’d met, she’d been immediately impressed by her, but more because she was the famed Commander Shepard out to stop injustice and bring down the rogue Spectre than anything else. She’d soon gained respect for her abilities by experiencing them in person, and she’d become something of an idol for her. The ultimate warrior bound by no rules and fighting for what’s right. And so “Commander Shepard” became simply “Commander”.

Soon, Tali came to know the commander as a person from her many visits. Tali was often surprised by the things she said, but she could not deny she’d learned from her. She opened Tali’s eyes to new perspectives she had never considered. They discussed more trivial subjects, as well. Tali discovered that the commander loved music and literature, and was, despite outward perception, quite shy. She had also learned that, despite Jon’s biotic abilities, she did not join the Alliance as a soldier, but as an engineer, which surprised her greatly. And through these conversations “Commander” became “Shepard”.

They became friends, Shepard and Tali. Sometime after Saren’s defeat and Sovereign’s destruction, Tali realized that she had ceased to think of Shepard as her commander, but instead as a friend. This pleased her, for Shepard was not only an exceptional soldier, but also very pleasant company. She was a fascinating individual, who delighted in hearing about Tali’s culture and teaching her of her own. She was also the only person, other than Garrus, with whom she could carry out a conversation about engineering, and felt comfortable with.

Then she was gone. And turned up again, just like before. A beacon of light against a sea of darkness. Showing up with insurmountable odds to face, and a mission they may not return from. Tali didn’t even need to think about it.

They grew much closer over the course of time on the second Normandy. It was during this time that she came to know her simply as “Jonica”. She told Tali about her childhood in the Reds, how she survived Akuze, what it felt like to come back from the brink of death. It was something about Akuze that officially brought Tali and Jonica to that new level of familiarity. It was after a visit to Tuchanka. They had helped Grunt through his Rite of Passage, and killed a thresher maw. It was the thresher maw that did it. Tali noticed, when the ground first began to rumble, a look of stark terror on Jon’s face, followed by a split second of absolute panic when it reared its head. It was so brief Tali convinced herself it was just her imagination. Jon seemed like her ordinary self as they dodged the maw’s attacks, and eventually brought it down. There was a look of dark resolution on her face when it fell that did not fade until they were back on the Normandy.

Later, she came to Tali’s room, trembling. She was shocked to see her in such a state. She’d never seen her display any sort of fear before, and this was utter panic.


“Tali...” she begged

She threw herself into her chest. Tali stood stone still, alarm having frozen her body. But as she began to sob into her chest, she slid her arms around her cautiously. They remained like that for some time. Eventually, when she had calmed down, she explained. The thresher maw had reminded her of Akuze, when her whole squad died, and she was left alone, running from a thresher maw. She admitting that the experience still haunted her, and she disdained being lauded for her actions on Akuze when she had merely survived when other had not.

“I didn’t do anything special.” she had said, “No great acts of bravery or valor. I just got away.”

And from then on she was “Jon” to Tali.

Jon. Her best friend. Her confidante. Her kindred spirit. Her... There came a point when Tali could no longer deny that the nature of her feelings for Jon were not purely platonic. She’d had something of a crush on Commander Shepard for some time, but that had become background noise to actually developing a relationship with Jonica. A friendship. One that now this suddenly very serious and hard to ignore crush could interfere with.

Tali was scared when she finally slipped up and implied her feelings to Jon. Then pleasantly surprised to learn they were not unrequited. Their relationship, all of it, all the firsts for Tali were a frightening new adventure...

But still totally worth it.

The time they spent apart when Jonica returned to the Alliance wasn’t easy. Reuniting with her... Tali knew she didn’t want to ever be separated again. So here they were. In Jonica’s bed, the light of the aquarium casting a blue glow over the room. And Jon had so much weight on her shoulders. Weight she didn’t let anyone else see wearing her down.


Jonica hummed sleepily in response.

“I love you.”

Joncia opened her eyes to gaze into Tali’s own.

“I love you too.”

The words hung in the air for some time. Comfortably, letting them both exist in the stillness for a moment.

“Thank you for being here, Tali.”

“I’ll always be here, Jon. Always.”

posted this
Time ago

Aerie's Thoughts - liveinink - Baldur's Gate [Archive of Our Own]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works

Aerie/F!Bhaalspawn fic

Aerie had grown unaccustomed to feeling joyful since her capture. And at the same time had grown used to the laughter of others around her, in discordance with her own feelings. So when Jenya decided to put on an impromptu show for a small group of children, she’d expected to feel the same.

A halfling child had approached Jenya in the streets, curious about her appearance. The tiefling woman was more than happy to indulge any and all questions. Jenya was an eye-catching sight, for multiple reasons. Her skin was a common human shade, but her hair couldn’t quite be called blonde. It was just a shade too unnaturally yellow for that. And her pink eyes were certainly noticeable. And even though her horns were small, they were there, along with a swishing tail. Then in addition to any odd features or colorations, she just so happened to be rather beautiful, with a charming and alluring personality.

So of course she drew attention. And the curious child walked up, full of questions about tieflings, that turned to questions about bards, that turned to questions about adventurers. Jenya, being the performer she was, answered them all with panache. Other children were drawn to her, and she happily began recounting tales to all of them.

The rest of their party decided to split up and purchase supplies while Jenya entertained the children. Aerie stayed behind. There was something about watching Jenya perform. The enthusiasm, the joy, the... generosity Jenya had towards the audience. She truly wanted to brighten their days. And how did she stay smiling and singing with so many troubles hounding her? Aerie was no stranger to performers. Jenya, though, she was something new. Aerie found herself smiling as she looked on. Feeling... content? Happy? Maybe.

Jenya told tales and played her lyre for some time before sending the children off. She rejoined Aerie with a smile.

“You’re very good at that.” Aerie said.

“I’m a bard.” Jenya replied. “It’s what I do, darling.”

Aerie tried to not to blush.

“But you’re a very good bard.”

Jenya took Aerie’s hand, giving it a gentle kiss with a deep bow.

“Thank you, my dear.”

Aerie was speechless. If Jenya kept doing things like that, she might forget how to speak altogether.

“Shall we find the others?” Jenya asked.

Aerie simply nodded.

As Jenya turned to go after their friends, Aerie smiled to herself. She hadn’t felt quite so happy in a long time. Jenya was a good person, and she was kind to Aerie. She listened.

And she made Aerie smile.

It couldn’t take away the loss of her wings, or the time she spent as a spectacle in a cage. But maybe it was a start.

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Time ago

Jaheira's Thoughts - liveinink - Baldur's Gate [Archive of Our Own]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works

Jaheira/F!Bhaalspawn fic

How long are you meant to grieve the death of a spouse?

Months? Years? The rest of your life?

Do you feel the same pain forever, or does it ease into an ache at some point? Does the ache fade with time?

Do you always mourn the loss of a loved one but also heal from it? Do you move on?

Jaheira didn’t know. She’d only lost the one spouse. If Kivan was anything to go by, it wasn’t going to get much easier. But there were ways it was and wasn’t easier for her already. Living with Khalid’s loss. And she didn’t know if she was supposed to feel that way.

She missed him terribly. So often. Sometimes something would happen that would remind her of him, sometimes he entered her mind unbidden. Sometimes she wished he was there to share a moment with her, and his absence felt like a hole in her heart.

Other moments... Others moments she almost felt fine. Was that right? Was she supposed to almost feel fine? Already? It hadn’t been so very long ago he died, she wasn’t supposed to be coping with it well, not yet. It felt like betraying him.

The number of people she had told before of grief feeling different for everyone, of people mourning in their own way at their own pace... and yet she didn’t feel any of her old advice quite right for her now. Maybe it was that she had a cause to work toward, a task to focus on, maybe that helped her feel less pained all the time. But didn’t Khalid deserve more from her? Would he want that from her?

The honest truth she knew was no. He would want her to move on. That didn’t stop her guilt. Nor did it stop the guilt she felt every time she spoke to Alleden. Looked at Alleden.

The elven aasimar Bhaalspawn was kind, brave, good, loyal... qualities which Khalid had possessed. She was a good friend, a good leader, a good listener. She was also extremely attractive.

Pale gold skin, silver hair, golden eyes, celestial beauty, and a noble demeanor... Jaheira had of course noticed when they first met, but it was different then. Then it was simply a fact. Something that was immediately apparent, but had little effect on Jaheira. Now...

Now both Alleden’s inner and outer beauty had much too much of an effect on Jaheira. Something had changed between them, and Jaheira didn’t want to identify it as Khalid’s death. The fact that she was now single was one surrounded in tragedy. She shouldn’t be pursuing a new relationship so soon after Khalid’s death. Years from now, maybe. But now? It felt so cold. Like she wasn’t giving him the respect he deserved.
Ant yet, rationally she couldn’t deny that the Khalid she knew would want her to be happy. He had said as much in the past. Given the nature of their lifestyles, they had discussed losing one another before. Khalid had always said he’d want her to find love again if she could.

But that knowledge didn’t automatically change how she felt. It was too fast, it had to be.


A warm voice broke her from her reverie.

Alleden, soft, strong, gentle Alleden stood before her, looking concerned, with a cat in her arms.

“I found this little guy just off the road, can you heal him? I’ve only managed to improve it a bit.”

The cat looked like he had a broken leg and some deep gashes. His ear was torn. Jaheira’s heart swelled, and she wasn’t sure if it was only out of sympathy for the cat.

“I can heal him.”

The smile on Alleden’s face was almost was warm as Jaheira’s own healing magic. Jaheira’s heart swelled again.

This was going to be complicated.

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Time ago

Viconia's Thoughts - liveinink - Baldur's Gate [Archive of Our Own]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works

Vicona/F!Bhaalspawn fic

Viconia had found herself watching Torndon often of late. More often than she would like to admit. It aggravated her how fixated she had become, and yet she’d not like to stop.

Torndon was discussing something or other with one of her thieves, a familiar half smile on her face. That smile was the only thing that betrayed her otherwise innocent face. The half-elf had the looks of a fairy tale princess; the features of her face were soft and delicate, and enchantingly beautiful. Her pale skin was unblemished, her black hair fell in perfect, loose ringlets about her shoulders. Her bright blue eyes shone with intelligence, and sometimes a twinkle of mischief made its way through; but Torndon was a master of deception. She could make her eyes innocent as she pleased. Most of the time. Yes, she looked the part of a fair maiden. And it was not entirely untrue. But Viconia knew better.

She knew eager, lustful eyes. Soft lips hot on her skin. Teeth and tongue and skilled hands roaming.

She knew ferocity and prowess in battle; a steadfast and strong ally dancing through space and cutting down foes.

She knew deviousness and wit. The kind that could infiltrate and take over a thieves guild from under its master’s nose.

Any still, through it all, through every complex layer... Torndon was good. She was a good person. Thoroughly and unwaveringly. Much as she had other sides, other very appealing sides, she was just so good.

Infuriatingly, unquestionably... inspiringly good.

The kind of good Viconia once derided. The kind she had never strived to be, and probably never would be. Torndon’s goodness was aggravating, but... she was getting under Viconia’s skin. In a way she didn’t want to stop, but it frightened her.

Torndon, finished with her conversation it would seem, walked over to Viconia.

“Okay, well, now that that’s sorted, I am free for the evening.”

She wore a suggestive grin.

“Trouble with your thieves?” Viconia asked.

“No, just a bit of business to work out. But I’m lucky Jariel’s good at running things while I’m away.”

Torndon had been running her faction of the guild well, that much was undeniable. Her underlings were content, and there was always a constant stream of gold coming in. Gold that Torndorn ensured found the right pockets.

Her cleverness and competence in her new position of power were very attractive. Before Torndon had acquired this guild, Viconia had begun to doubt the growing relationship between the two of them. After all, Torndon was insufferably good at times. Despite the amazing quality of the sex, it can’t be worth it. Then Torndon had displayed an almost ruthlessness in taking down Mae’Var. She showed not only great skill at manipulation, but also a capacity to obtain power. And that, combined with all her other attractive features, had made her irresistible.

“Something on your mind?” Torndon broke Viconia out of her thoughts.

“Nothing you need worry about.”

The look on Torndon’s face said she’d like to argue, but she seemed to think better of it.

“Well, in that case, how would you like to not think with me, all night?”

Torndon leaned in close to Viconia, so that their bodies were almost touching. She slowly placed a soft kiss against Viconia’s neck, and Viconia felt a flare of heat in her stomach.

Torndon pulled back, her eyes full of lust, but waiting for an answer.


However much they may argue about courses of action and morality, whatever differences they may have between them...

This was definitely worth it.

Time ago

10th July 2019

breaks my chronology just to post this

i should be getting ready for work but what am i doing instead? drawing waterfall-san

Time ago

Time ago

🖼: William-Adolphe Bouguereau | 📷: [endocathexis]( "Edits by endocathexis on Tumblr)

Time ago

Alex! My Shepard!

Huge shout out to @lynaiss for giving me advice about CSP!